Baking a cake...before, during and after

Danielle loves being a big sis and had fun baking a cake with W. Here's some pics she took along the way...

Happy Birthday

T had her first real birthday and is now officially 6 years old. What fun to watch her open presents, blow out candles and eat her Curious George cake. And even better was a visit a few days before by Jeff's mom & step dad and cousin Sarah. A good time was had by all!

July Update

Yes, we are still alive. To say that life has been full would be an understatement. And I do feel badly that I haven’t updated the blog more often. But honestly, I just haven’t had the time. Or perhaps, it is better to say that when I have had a few moments to myself, I’ve taken that time to recharge instead.

There is no way I can share all the happenings of the last couple of months, so I’m going to share a few little stories to give you a feel for what life is like nowadays. And just to let you know, the lice have never come back!

“Cake me I love!”

Our children are quickly adapting to an American palate. At first, they wouldn’t eat anything sweet. But now, the girls have discovered vanilla wafers, maple syrup and most importantly, CAKE. Having 2 birthdays a week apart (Hannah and Josh) introduced them to this wonderful concoction and they can’t seem to get enough. Not that we have cake every day, of course, but when we do have it, they will get so excited. Danielle and “T” made one together this week, and “T” told Danielle that the two of them should get up in the middle of the night and eat the rest of it themselves! But they still don’t like chocolate. “T” is having a birthday of her own soon, and her plan is to serve chocolate and cake. That way, the rest of us will be eating the chocolate, and she can have the cake all to herself.

“Moses is dead?”

When talking about a Bible story the other day, “A” shared what he knew about Moses. He was shocked to find out that Moses wasn’t alive, but had died thousands of years ago.

“Mommy, can you make an airplane?”

“A” is still learning that we Americans don’t make any of the things we use on a daily basis. He asked me one day if I could make an airplane like the one we flew over in from Ethiopia. I said I could never do that by myself. “You and Daddy make plane?” I tried to show him a picture on the internet of planes being built and I think he finally got it. But I can’t count the times I’ve been asked if I could make something, like a hot-air balloon, a car, a computer, a TV, etc. And now that he knows that machines make things, he’s asking how much those machines cost, hoping we can buy them and make things ourselves. (sigh)

“Mommy? Mommy? Mommy? Mommy?”

If I had a quarter for each time I’ve heard that phrase….I’m trying to teach them to COME TO ME when you have a question and not YELL FROM WHEREVER YOU ARE, but it’s still a work in progress. This problem is followed in frequency by all three of them talking to me at the EXACT SAME TIME, all saying, “Mommy, look at me! Mommy….Mommy….look at me….Mommy…”

“Mommy pretty.”

Little “W” and I were in the laundry room together this week, doing chores. I had on a pair of hideous jogging pants, the kind that make you the poster child of “What Not to Wear”, along with an ancient T-shirt, and straggly hair hurriedly pulled into a pony tail. I felt a little hand rubbing my leg, and I looked down as little “W” said in her wee little voice, “Mommy pretty.” I just about cried.

Speaking of little “W”, she has really attached herself to me the last few weeks. Before, she liked me well enough, but not as if I was her mother. But now, she is my little shadow quite often, and says “Mommy I like,” or “Mommy I love,” on a regular basis. She’s getting more cozy with Daddy, too.

Milestones

Both “A” and “T” are little swimmers now. “A” can ride a bike without training wheels and “T” is riding much better on her scooter. “A” had his first dental work done this past week, and didn’t even need me to stay back with him. “W” can now put on her own socks and shoes, and go “shinty bet” (or potty) all by herself.

School Days

We started our home school year on July 13th. Doing a year around schedule will give us more flexibility throughout the year. “A”, “T”, and “W” are all doing well. “W” is really a little too young to do much school, but she joins in for Bible time, songs and does her own little math. My older three students often find their way downstairs to the basement to join us as they get their own school done. Having the extra helpers makes my job much easier.

“A” and “T” are beginning to learn how to read. Mind you, they’ve never really read anything before, even in their original language. They could write their name, and that was about it. And with them, you’re not just teaching them phonics, but English as well. It’s hard to understand that a picture of a bell stands for the ‘b’ sound if you don’t know what a ‘bell’ is. They are very eager learners, and for me, it’s very fulfilling to watch their faces light up as they read their very first words on their own.

Three months and counting…….

On August 4th, we’ll have been with these children for three months. And our first post-placement report will be due soon after. For those of you who haven’t adopted before, I can tell you that the paperwork doesn’t seem to ever end. Life is much easier now than it was at the beginning, thankfully. We’re looking forward to what adventures the next three months will bring.

Blessings,
Julie

All Creatures Great and Small (and not so great)

This past week we were able to introduce some new animals to our children. And they also introduced a new animal to us. (More on that later.) We took them to a local state park, where they saw mallard ducks, other birds, some squirrels and fish. Our handpicked son really likes fish. Not to eat, I think, but to catch. He saw little minnows in the shallows of the lake and thought he could catch them, with his hands. He couldn’t, but it was fun watching him try.

A few days later, we took them to another park that has outdoor animal exhibits (Bays Mtn. Park for you locals.) They saw raccoons, snakes (they didn’t like those), turtles, owls, river otters and deer. When we were standing near the deer enclosure, surrounded by woods, “A” asked, “Mom…monkeys?” He was obviously looking for the same furry little primates he was used to seeing back home in Ethiopia. I had to tell him, “No monkeys in America, but we have squirrels.” I could tell he wasn’t impressed.

They don’t seem to share my homemades’ fascination of insects and arachnids. If we show them a cool ‘bug’ they respond as if we’re holding toxic uranium. But unfortunately, they did share one little bug with us: lice. Last week, we discovered little “W” had quite a collection of them, and their eggs, in her beautiful sweet curly locks. Obviously they had hitched a ride here from Ethiopia, unbeknownst to us. We ended up shaving her head, as there was no way we could rid her of the all the nits. We’re glad we did, because even with her head shaved, we were still finding nymphs and adults hanging on for dear life. We treated her, and her blood siblings, washed everything in sight, and gave a sigh of relief.

But alas, the drama had just begun. Yesterday, we discovered that Danielle, Hannah and Josh had picked up new little ‘friends’ as well. Just nymphs, no nits or adults, but lice all the same. Our family looked like a troop of monkeys, with us sitting on the front steps and inspecting each others’ heads. Our handpicked kids were particularly helpful, having much more experience than the rest of us in lice detection. “T” in particular was an expert. Jeff and I seem to have escaped the invasion, at least for now.

Today marks the one month anniversary of when we ‘got’ the kids. And I guess we’ve been pretty blessed so far: all their medicals have come back normal, the kids are attaching wonderfully, only a few discipline issues to date and language is coming right along. If lice are the worst thing we have to deal with, then I’d say we’re doing pretty good!

Tomorrow we’re travelling over the ‘mountain’ to visit the Ethiopian Team from Christian World Adoption, our agency. One of their workers is a lovely Ethiopian lady who has been translating for us over the phone and Skype. So this time, the kids will get to meet her in person.
As I’m typing this, Hannah is teaching the kids to say, “Hey y’all, watch this!” in a thick Southern accent. Oh dear…another bonding moment…

Blessings,
Julie

Banana Republic

There have been many changes in our household over the past two weeks. One has to do with food. Did you know that if you buy 21 bananas on one day, that by the end of the next day, they will all be eaten? (I have a gut feeling that Chiquita stock might be going up soon.) And did you know that a little 4 year old girl who weighs all of 31 pounds can eat 4 eggs plus fruit, bread and tea for breakfast? And perhaps most amazing, is that some children think that chocolate has the most disgusting taste you can imagine. It’s almost as bad to them as cake, brownies, or muffins, or even worse, ice cream!

For those of you who know me well, you know that baking is one of my love languages. And to realize my kids will not appreciate my homemade goodies is a little disappointing. At least they accepted my sad attempt at ingera, the national ‘bread’ of Ethiopia. It’s like a sourdough crepe, and they use it as a plate as well as a spoon for picking up their food. They laughed at them at first, but ate them anyway.

Another change has to do with time. Where does it go? Just a few days ago I finally managed to get our luggage back in our closet, but not all our trip things are put away. I can’t see the garden I planted in the early spring because of all the weeds in the way. Sorry to be so late on my thank you notes, but I’ll get to them eventually. Be assured we are very appreciative of the generosity of so many people!

My homemade kids have fended for themselves for years in the kitchen, so I’m having to get used to preparing 3 meals a day again. And I love to see them eat, even if there are many foods they politely try, then say “No, Mom…garbage.” At least the girls like several foods their brother won’t touch, like bacon and strawberries.

There have been a lot of firsts…first bikes, first drinking fountains (I never realized how many our church had), first glue sticks, first new shoes, first trip to Wal-Mart…they seem to take it all in stride and want to go with Mommy or Daddy anytime one of us needs to run an errand. They aren’t fearful in the least, except of dogs….T. and W. are learning to not be afraid of all the canines in our neighborhood.

I found out that back home, their family had cows, goats and chickens. A. loves chickens, and I took them to a friend’s house where they raise some chickens. He picked one up right away and held it close, talked softly to it, petted it…the chicken seemed quite happy. Obviously, A. had held quite a few chickens in his time.

We’re getting the ‘un-fun’ stuff out of the way, like their first doctor appointment a few days ago. Today I have to take them to have blood drawn, and X-rays to rule out TB and help verify W.’s age. (I’m praying God’s grace will be sufficient!). Next week it’s their first dentist visit….in their lives, I’m guessing, by the looks of their teeth. And their first round of immunizations the next day. (sigh)

I felt a little guilty when talking to the dentist’s receptionist. She just gushed about how wonderful it was that we had kept this sibling group together, given them a new life in America, etc. I have to admit the warm fuzzy feeling about adoption left us a few hours after we picked them up in Addis. Adoption is work…real work. It’s not always fun, it’s certainly not easy, and it doesn’t end. Don’t get me wrong. Our transition has gone quite well and it could be oh so much harder. But the reality is that it takes time for 3 little complete strangers, with a multitude of needs and a foreign language and culture, to meld into your family…and into your heart.

We are bonding well, but it will take some time before we ‘feel’ like one big happy family. I’m very pleased with the progress we’ve all made thus far. And I’m sure the Chiquita Corporation is very pleased at our children’s banana intake.

Blessings,

Julie

"Normal" Children

Well, the suspense is over. It looks like we have some normal children after all. Not angels, not sweeter-than-honey attitudes, but everyday, normal, and at times disobedient, self-centered, stubborn, strong-willed kids. Kind of like our homemade kids have been over the years. So it's no surprise, and completely expected. I'm just glad we're over the jet lag is it's not too exhausting to deal with!

And it's not horrible, really. One of them is strong willed and is deciding that not eating is a good way to pout. We've had a chat with an Ethiopian lady at our adoption agency, and she talked to our child as well. We have the peace of mind that the issue is very clear, and that Jeff and I have the mindset that our will is going to outlast our child's. I'm glad they are comfortable enough with us to act 'normal' and not put on a front of trying to please us, while they're hearts are far from desiring to do so.

So now the real parenting begins. Please pray for wisdom and softened hearts. Pray we'd know how to respond, not merely react. Pray that the love of Jesus would permeate our home, words and family, and that we can raise our children 'in the way they should go.'

Blessings,
Julie

When it rains...

Today is Monday, and it's hard to believe we've been home 3 days now. The transition with the kids has gone amazingly well! Especially when you consider all the 'drama' we've faced: our basement had standing water in the mechanical room when we returned. It appears the HVAC sump pump stopped working. The result? Mold growing behind the baseboards and sheet rock in a corner where 4 rooms meet....you can imagine the mess that is! Jeff has cut out the moldly parts already. The cardboard boxes my Christmas trees were in, ruined...the floor will have to be taken up in a part of Jeff's office, no one can play in the basement, Jeff had to move his office upstairs, etc...having to face that the very first day back.......blech!

The ice maker keeps freezing up, an inch of ice had to be cleared from the bottom of the freezer yesterday. Today, a leak under the kitchen sink. This morning, a very scary near car accident for Julie (someone pulled out in front of me, I had to stand on the breaks, swerve to avoid T-boning them...fortunately, went through some grass and dirt, no damage done, but what a freak out!). Let's see, what else......Josh crashed on his scooter showing off (no big deal, really, just a scrape.) But honestly, it seems more than mere coincidence at this point!

So, please pray for our family's protection and God's continued grace as we adjust to life together with our three new blessings!

Due to some privacy concerns, I have removed some personal information from our blog, including the full names of our handpicked kids. Long story short, in our case, we have evidence that there could be some unwanted contact in the future that would most definetely not be in the best interest of our children. For their emotional well-being, we are taking steps to prevent that from happening. For those who have adopted before, this subject is a complicated one I know. There's no need to share further details here, and there's nothing to worry about, but this seems a prudent step to take based on our particular situation.

Now, on to more pleasant things. Kids are eating well. They love eggs, oranges and bananas, corn, avacados...and they'll eat p.b.&j. and mac n cheese, even if it's not their favorite. The little one eats more than her older sister by far. We keep expanding our shared vocabulary, but we've got a long way to go. Today we started doing some simple chores together. A. (boy) wasn't too excited about it, but he eventually went along with it. When I was cleaning the floor with W., that's when I saw the water leak under the sink.

I bought helmets and new shoes for them yesterday, in part so they could ride some scooters we have. T. gave her new shoes a big hug and smiled so sweetly. A. and T. both said thank you more than once. Little W. was busy stomping on her shoes, as her's light up.

A. was sad when we went on a short walk in our neighborhood yesterday, and asked to visit the house of a friend who was adopted at the same time he was. I tried to explain how far away from here she lived (about an 18 hour drive), and used the word 'plane'. Then he got it and his little face just fell. I felt sorry for him, so today we sent his friend an email picture. It's so hard to explain even simple things to these children at this point!

I'll probably take the children to church this week. I think they'll be ready, and I'll have my homemade kids be their 'buddies' in their classes. I'm so thankful their orphanage did a good job of introducing them to Jesus. (They call him Yay-zus). They know several praise songs in Amharic and are quick to bow their little heads and clasp their hands before meals and at bedtime. They are watching the Jesus Film in Oromo-Arsi as I type. I'll be buying the Children's version in Amharic for them, which I'm sure they'll love.

It is a little exhausting at times to have to constantly watch them. They don't know what mail is, or where to color with crayon (not on furniture!), to not ride an adult bicycle, to not pet the bunnies' ears backwards, etc etc etc. But how could they know? They've never been where there were 'things' and they are only curious. So we have to be kind and patient, but consistent and firm. One day this stage will be over, but for now, I don't trust them on their own anywhere.

We are bonding well. They compete over my attention, and I'm careful to give it equally, not letting one of them 'win' while the other gets left out (though it seems that's what they want at times.) The girls are great big sisters, and Josh is making a real effort to find things he and A. can share. Jonathan graduates on Saturday, and I'll leave Josh and our handpicked kids at home with Grandma Jane. If I had a few more weeks with them under my belt, I'd take them along. But it's just too soon at this point.

Here's a few pictures. One was done in Addis Ababa right before our embassy appointment. The other I took this morning. Thanks again for your prayers. As evidenced by all our 'drama', we still need them!

Blessings,
Julie